The pain was tearing me apart. The more I tried to get rid off it, the more it engulfed me. It was controlling me instead of me controlling myself. I tried to flee, but I failed. I ran, I stumbled and again I ran. I was a prisoner of my own world. The virtual world created by me became my biggest enemy.
I used to sit in one dark corner of the room trying hard to create my own stuffs. Yes, I did. But they failed to understand my music. I do not blame anyone and I resent speaking anything against anybody. Thus, I stood all alone with my axe.
At this point of time depression overcame me. Drugs became my soulmate.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
PART 1
I exist, yes I do, but somewhere down the lane lays my identity, unexplored and unventured. The socialites think am nebulous, the counter culturists think am ‘one of them’, but still my identity lays hidden. Thanks to some of my friends who have inspired me to start a blog of my own. Maybe some portion of my estranged mind will be revealed through my write ups.
September, 2008
The scattered room of mine reflects my character. Cigarette butts everywhere, ashes all over, old cd’s and an acoustic guitar. The room is dark enough to give me peace. Here I sit, whisper, make love, compose tunes et al.
I have always been criticized for doing absolutely nothing for the music scene. I won’t justify myself on this issue. Rather I would say that my views on music have changed gradually. The first time I heard Ella Fitzgerald, I felt ‘ if you want to make love not sex, then listen to this Lady.’ I began exploring different forms of music, especially Afro jazz and brazillian bop. I tried out ‘ The Mountain’ played by the great tenor sax player Ibrahim. The challenge was how to make my guitar sound as a saxophone. I tried picking up ‘tico tico’, Charlie Parker version. While improvising on the lines I felt the bliss hidden underneath. Yes, it happened. Now, that’s how I define music i.e. EMOTIONS.
BLUEMOONHIGH will always remain as one of my favorite compositions. I composed it the day we broke off, only to get her back after a couple of days. Though, I have drifted away from metal, but I do encourage the fact that finally some originally music is happening in our city. I respect all you METALHEADS. Respect in the truest sense.
Music became my identity. I tried out composing some tunes for the peace movement that is currently going on in the ‘hippie land’ called Gokarna. I liked the musicians out there, especially the Germans. I could relate myself somewhat with them. Its not necessary that one needs to show his technical efficiency everytime he plays the guitar. You can make music by playing only 5 notes or maybe less. So I sit down sometime playing songs from Lennons solo album.
I believe that we struggled a lot more while forming a band. To keep a band together was as difficult as surviving in an asylum. The credit lies to Surojit aka Patol, the ex-bassist of Hobos, who decided to choose me as the guitar player of then formed rock n roll band, Apolo – 40. We were definitely a talented bunch of idiots, who knew the road to victory. But when too much of talent collides the result is bound to be zero. We used our talent but in an entirely wrong direction. We struggled, we fought and sometimes we won. Except the key player Debarpito, ex urban reflectionz keyboardist, we all had cheap equipments. I joined the band with an experience of one year. It was an honor to play with these guys. They had full faith on me and this boosted my morale to a large extent. I gave my 100 % during practice. I didn’t have a comp back then, so most of the songs I used to pick up in the practice pad, listening to the solos note by note. The most important part is that we had Fun while we played. We were kind of those 80’s youth gone wild due to some phenomenon. We ate together, drank, doped, travelled and fought, leaving back the traces of distant memory. We had one thing in common. We were all suffering from Paranoia caused by the social disorder.
September, 2008
The scattered room of mine reflects my character. Cigarette butts everywhere, ashes all over, old cd’s and an acoustic guitar. The room is dark enough to give me peace. Here I sit, whisper, make love, compose tunes et al.
I have always been criticized for doing absolutely nothing for the music scene. I won’t justify myself on this issue. Rather I would say that my views on music have changed gradually. The first time I heard Ella Fitzgerald, I felt ‘ if you want to make love not sex, then listen to this Lady.’ I began exploring different forms of music, especially Afro jazz and brazillian bop. I tried out ‘ The Mountain’ played by the great tenor sax player Ibrahim. The challenge was how to make my guitar sound as a saxophone. I tried picking up ‘tico tico’, Charlie Parker version. While improvising on the lines I felt the bliss hidden underneath. Yes, it happened. Now, that’s how I define music i.e. EMOTIONS.
BLUEMOONHIGH will always remain as one of my favorite compositions. I composed it the day we broke off, only to get her back after a couple of days. Though, I have drifted away from metal, but I do encourage the fact that finally some originally music is happening in our city. I respect all you METALHEADS. Respect in the truest sense.
Music became my identity. I tried out composing some tunes for the peace movement that is currently going on in the ‘hippie land’ called Gokarna. I liked the musicians out there, especially the Germans. I could relate myself somewhat with them. Its not necessary that one needs to show his technical efficiency everytime he plays the guitar. You can make music by playing only 5 notes or maybe less. So I sit down sometime playing songs from Lennons solo album.
I believe that we struggled a lot more while forming a band. To keep a band together was as difficult as surviving in an asylum. The credit lies to Surojit aka Patol, the ex-bassist of Hobos, who decided to choose me as the guitar player of then formed rock n roll band, Apolo – 40. We were definitely a talented bunch of idiots, who knew the road to victory. But when too much of talent collides the result is bound to be zero. We used our talent but in an entirely wrong direction. We struggled, we fought and sometimes we won. Except the key player Debarpito, ex urban reflectionz keyboardist, we all had cheap equipments. I joined the band with an experience of one year. It was an honor to play with these guys. They had full faith on me and this boosted my morale to a large extent. I gave my 100 % during practice. I didn’t have a comp back then, so most of the songs I used to pick up in the practice pad, listening to the solos note by note. The most important part is that we had Fun while we played. We were kind of those 80’s youth gone wild due to some phenomenon. We ate together, drank, doped, travelled and fought, leaving back the traces of distant memory. We had one thing in common. We were all suffering from Paranoia caused by the social disorder.
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